11.29.2009

the rain splatters the window.
causing the ink to run off the page.
and it's blank again.
clean? or just a empty slate ready for more hurt?
the fabric of your being is tearing. i can see the rips people over look.
would you let Him patch you up?
it will be beautiful.
the words your heart whispers in the dark are not as hidden as you'd like to think.
your eyes scream of the loneliness.
you walk with the smile on your face that was pasted on after you brushed your teeth this morning.
waiting for something to dismantle it. doubting anything can.
but longing for someone to see through it.
someone to say something that will cause you to actually feel.
you don't care about the test in your hand or the rain under your boots.
let's stop this meaningless chatter. the noise we fill the air with to feel less alone.
maybe if we surround ourselves with hands and feet and mouths we will be less alone.
but at the end of the day, everyone is gone. and your heart is all you have.
what will you do then? will you stare at the phone and long for a text from the person you've told yourself you will not talk to?
will you ignore it and hope the sharpness goes away? hope the memories fade to the background?

You don't know if you could do it. you don't know if your heart is strong enough, well. no ones is. no heart was meant to be strong enough on its own. if it was, we would not need Him. shoving pain aside and deeming it 'no big deal' is making light of His death. He did not die for 'no big deals.' Give Him credit for His sacrifice. Let yourself feel the pain. Go to the bottom of your heart and let yourself feel it, it is there that He meets you. He will always be deeper than your hurt, and when you allow yourself to go to the depths of your pain, it means He is there, and He is bigger and more powerful than if you never allowed Him to be there. It means He is stronger than He was to you yesterday. It gives Him honor, it allows Him to do exactly what He gave up everything for. Doesn't He deserve that? He yearns for you. Doesn't He deserve all of you?

No comments:

Post a Comment

I love hearing what you have to say, please share!