10.12.2010

our place.

I wake up and wish you'd just walk into the room, sit on my bed and smile at me. Until that day, I search for you. You are sometimes right there and sometimes you are hidden away. I love our special secret place. I know I'll find rest there. I know I'll be safe there. I close my eyes and ask to meet you in our place. You answer yes, as you always do. In my minds eye I see you walk over to me along the cobblestone path, and my heart is relieved to be here with you. You look me in the eyes and slowly draw me up in your arms, enveloping me in your embrace. You whisper in that perfect voice of your love for me. You say I am wonderful, and everything will be okay. Your voice assures me your words are true and I sink deeper into you, every beat of your heart fills my soul as I soak you in.

Our place is beautiful, it always is. Your light shines through the leaves, illuminating the trees into brilliant shades of gold. Your smile is filled with more love than the world could hold, and it is for me. You listen to me share my dreams, my fears, my regrets, and confusions. You never need me to explain it again, you know it all already. You are never half-there or distracted, you are totally focused on me. Sometimes I talk too much, and I forget to let you speak, you never get upset at me for that though, you're kind about it. I don't know how I can forget about the love, joy, and beauty of our place but I guess I do sometimes because I don't come to meet you as often as you want me to. You are always waiting for the invitation to meet me, you are always eagerly waiting for my presence. Sometimes I come but I'm not fully there and I make excuses that hurt you, but you are never angry with me. I'm sorry for that. I know that you love it when I tell you how much I need you, you told me that in the book you wrote. I can see how joyful you become when I give you all my love, affection, and adoration. When I let you lead me deeper into our secret place, I become engrossed with who you are alone, and all worry of what others may think quickly fades. When you show me how much you love me, I can no longer just be a standby spectator of you. I must talk with you every morning. I must dance for joy in church and in my room. I must give you all my affection and love, with every breath I breathe I must love you.

Your love has no other options, it sweeps me up and does a new thing, what no one else can do. You are jealous for me. You want me to not only praise you in my room, lifting my hands and kneeling before you alone, but in your church as well. Why should I be moved by your Spirit into a physical act of love towards you in our secret place but be too chained to a fear of man and tradition in your church to act the same. I need you to help me overcome my fear, I can do nothing without you, and you are so strong. Thank you for what you have shown me about yourself, I want to see more, would you show me more in our special secret place?

Jesus, you have changed everything. Thank you for changing everything.

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